Dear Diary,
Life is good. Naps are life. I’ve officially upgraded to having my very own blanket when I sleep with Mom and Dad. It’s like being royalty—except Dad says I bark too much. Too much? I’m just protecting the kingdom!
So now there’s this collar. It beeps, it vibrates, and if I really ignore it… it bites! I don’t know how a collar can bite me, but trust me—it does. It even has two little “teeth” I see when Dad straps it on. Pretty sure it’s part robot.
But last night? Oh, last night was glorious. Dad was sleeping, and I let one rip—right in his face. Woke him up instantly. I wanted to laugh so bad, but everyone was asleep. Silent victory.
Also, side note: I think the other dogs are jealous of my blanket game. Look at us in the photo—me and my buddy passed out like champions. He’s hogging the small bed, but I’ve got the deluxe suite.
Anyway, gotta go. Time for another nap. Maybe another fart later. Stay tuned.
P.S. If that collar ever grows arms, I’m moving out.
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