Dear Diary,
This cold and snow situation is absolutely unacceptable.
I was not built for this crap. My body, my soul, my entire vibe is meant for sunshine and warmth—not whatever frozen betrayal is happening outside right now. I stepped one paw into the snow today and immediately questioned every life choice that led me here.
Let me be clear about the conditions I require: sunny, 75 degrees, not a single cloud in the sky. That is the correct setting. That is prime Reggie weather. Perfect for chasing squirrels (which I would absolutely catch if they stopped cheating), laying on warm concrete like a majestic loaf, and snoozing outside for hours like the champion napper I am.
Instead? Snow. Wind. Cold that goes straight to the bones I don’t even want to use today.
Blankets are not optional in this garbage. Blankets are necessary. Multiple layers. Preferably stacked just right so I can burrow underneath and pretend summer still exists. I will not be taking extended outdoor trips. I will not be lingering. I will do my business with speed and resentment.
Wake me when the sun comes back.
— Reggie 🐾