Dear Diary,
I get into everything. Cabinets. Closets. Laundry baskets. If it opens, I’m in it. If it doesn’t open, I try harder.
I make noises at night. It’s my time. The humans sleep. The house is quiet. I chirp. I thump. I knock things over. Eventually, the boss wakes up. And then? Fetch time. Yes, I play fetch. I’m not like the others.
But I stay far away from Reggie. That dog is a criminal. He forces me into positions I do not enjoy. I don’t know what his deal is, but I’m not signing up for whatever weird power trip he’s on.
I’m Ace. I’m fast. I’m clever. I’m nocturnal. And I’m not afraid to wake the humans if I’m bored.
— Signed, Ace the Night Shift