One Toad Photography
Dear Diary, Let’s get one thing straight: my butt is royalty. It does not touch the ground unless the surface meets my very specific standards of softness, plushness, and overall hiney luxury. Outside? Forget it. I sit on Arya. She’s warm, fluffy, and doesn’t complain (much). Inside? I require the finest blankets, cushions, or laps. […]
The Season of Barking and Demons So… we got new collars. Not the cute kind with flowers or bones. Nope. These are training collars. You know why? Because Reggie is a menace. A loud, blanket-burrowing, cat-hating menace. He barks when the humans pet someone else. He barks when the cats sneeze. He barks when the […]
Woof woof, fellow furballs and hooman fans! It’s me, Reggie, your favorite four-legged philosopher, barking out my latest blog post. Yeah, that’s right, I’ve got my own blog now. What, you thought only cats could go viral? Puh-lease. I’m here to spill the kibble on my daily dramas, and let me tell you, living with […]
Dear Diary, Victory is mine. Today, I did what no one else dared to do—I busted Bellatrix. Yep. Caught her red-pawed trying to sneak into the forbidden cabinet. I barked. Loud. The masters came running. She hissed. I wagged. They praised me like I was some kind of hero (which, let’s be honest, I am). […]
“The Transformation of the Masters & Operation: Ace Domination” Dear Diary, Something is definitely up. Bellatrix has been extra frisky lately. Like, tail-twitching, wall-scaling, demon-summoning frisky. I swear she’s possessed. Last night, the master screamed—actually screamed—and fell over. The other master rushed in, and then… he crawled to the bed on all fours. I watched […]
“The Bed That Was Mine” Dear Diary, Sometimes, when the chaos of this house swirls around me—Reggie bouncing, Arya snoring, Bellatrix plotting—I close my eyes and drift into a memory. A beautiful, quiet memory. The bed. It was mine. All mine. I picture myself stretched across the soft blankets, the sun warming my fur, and […]
“Queen of Naps and Reggie Surveillance” Dear Diary, I enjoy long naps. Morning naps. Afternoon naps. Pre-dinner naps. Post-dinner naps. Napping is a lifestyle. A calling. A sacred art. Arya gets it. She’s chill. She respects the nap. But this new dog—Reggie? He’s like a caffeinated squirrel in a dog suit. Always watching. Always moving. […]
“The Grill Guardian: Liquid Gold Edition” The master keeps putting stuff in this magical contraption called a Traeger. I don’t know what it is exactly, but I call it The Portal of Deliciousness. The smells? They last all day. I mean, it’s like bacon and brisket had a baby and that baby is singing to […]
“The Magical Leg Sauce” Dear Diary, Something incredible happened today. I was lounging upside down, as one does when one is a majestic beast of comfort, when my human walked by smelling like a spa exploded on his legs. I sniffed. I licked. And then… BOOM. I was in a happy place. Like, tail-wagging, cloud-floating, […]
Dear Diary, I stole it. The thing Ace humps. He’s terrible at it. No form. No commitment. So I took it. I’m showing him how it’s done. But that’s not the real issue. I overheard Ace talking to Onyx. Something about Onyx escaping to join a resistance. A resistance. What a joke, right? Still… I’m […]
Dear Diary, I’m officially classifying Reggie as The Fun Police. Anytime someone tries to do something fun—play, bark, chase a tail, steal a sock—he’s alerting the masters. Barking. Whining. Reporting us like we’re criminals. He’s paranoid. Always thinks the cats are after him. Always watching. Always tattling. And worst of all? Whenever the masters give […]
Dear Diary, I’m always watching. Always alert. Because Bellatrix? She’s up to something. The other day, I saw her try to trip the master down the basement stairs. She failed. But it was close. Too close. Later, I caught her drawing something—schematics. Blueprints. Arrows. Red marks. Green marks. Even blue marks. She’s planning something. I […]